Meet Fossilized RN™ — experienced, seasoned, and only slightly carbon-dated. After enough shifts, call lights, charting, admissions, discharges, and “quick questions” that were definitely not quick, this RN has officially earned prehistoric status. Fossilized RN™ has seen every kind of shift, survived every new charting system, and knows that when someone says, “We’ve always done it this way,” there’s probably a policy update coming tomorrow. Older? Maybe. Extinct? Not even close. Around Cretaceous General™, we prefer the term clinically vintage. 🦖🩺